Its now so close that you can’t look away .
But let’s just choose not stare it in its face for a lil bit longer.
The countdown to what is perhaps the single most overwhelming transition in a girl..a woman’s life has begun! A transformation that would be Emotional , Physical and everything in between and beyond.
A milestone that’s almost like the purpose of our being . Like our whole life , we go through various stages – just so that one day we reach here .
So that this glorious , mysterious cycle of life continues. Of becoming a mother.
No matter what you accomplish – personally or professionally , nothing else quite comes close to a challenge like this. The stakes are too high! Its definitely not one of those things that you just go ahead and do – coz its expected out of you or the time is running out .
Spiritual for some , Scary for some others – I’ve been treading this road to becoming a mother with a surprising calmness in the last a little less than 9 months.
There are moments of a quiet acceptance (fused with hysteria). And there are these endless stretches of denial. But as I sit some minutes away from appearing for the next round qualifier for a national ” Young Leaders” hunt-cum-campaign , exactly 10 days before the D day , I can’t help but wonder the irony or the pure simplicity of it all.
I was born to be this way – like Lady Gaga would say. To live a life – Of striving to find the balance . Of constantly battling confusions and contradictions . Of being unsure and yet taking the plunges rather than the easier routes . Of constantly failing yet keeping my hopes high . Of believing I am made for better things and not settling down for mediocrity. Of wanting to having the first word , the last word and god-damn the whole argument . Coz I am not willing to be set in one mould or let one role define me .
A wife , Mother , Manager , Boss or a leader . I want to try each of those roles out . I might do well in one more than the other ( to put it modestly).
But I want to try them all out – and Not choose one but enjoy the many faces of one life that ‘s all that we have to live ! Coz girls are not born to be the underdogs . They don’t get married to be tamed . And they definitely don’t bear children coz they can !
Its amazing how much introspection can happen in the waiting area on a metallic bench Twenty mins before a numerical/verbal ability test. As you try not to think too much about how good as a parent you’ ll turn out to be to a child you are about to bring into this world 10 days from now.
Whatever be the baby’s name . And whether – its a girl or a boy. And whatever path the child chooses . I know right now , at this moment – the one lesson I want him/ her to learn . To keep fighting – in action, words and spirit.
Coz silence doesn’t win wars or hearts. If you want to feel alive – you gotto make everyone around you realise – the stuff you are made of !! Loud and clear .
Sent on my BlackBerry® from Vodafone