We were chatting about stereotypes in the morning today and I thought it was about time this draft post changed its status to publish.

So this is how it goes. A month back , I let go of yet another opportunity to meet up with people and have a good time. Now don’t get me wrong, or do , but I am not anti social .I am married , with a kid , in a mid managerial job , in the middle of setting up my dream home and yes I also blog.

You are right , I am a super woman. That’s why I don’t have any needs. The recreational kinds,  that is  , because there are always other more important things to do.

I think that’s the story of many new age parents today. Interestingly , that has been the story with all parents ever . Generally speaking Its called prioritizing .  But Once upon a time , it used to be called – Sacrifice. A term that makes me bite my tongue and shudder inside.

Why? The thing with some people is that they still continue to rub their life – choices into everyone’s face in the name of all the Sacrifices that they make. Worse still , we are expected to behave in a certain way because of the choices we made. Especially mothers , more so in movies or advertising and you know how fact is stranger than fiction – so do the math about the real world too.

A video triggered this post , in its first avatar at least. I came across it on Facebook and for weeks I kept searching for it  , finally giving up coz it didn’t matter whether I tagged it here. This is how it went. A housewife loses weight to donate one of her kidneys to her husband – a best kept secret so that their almost teen kids don’t get freaked out as she jogs in the rains and eats lonely salad – only dinners . What’s wrong with that? Well – it seems only women & MOTHERS are capable of making these ‘SACRIFICES’ Coz we you see are MAHAAN or Great.

This is exactly the kind of stereotyping , in advertising and in real life that gets to me. So when I read this interview  that talks about Why Shonda Rhimes Doesn’t Want To Be Thanked For Her ‘Sacrifices’ As A Mother , my heart sang with joy.

This is the kind of Mother I would like to be to my son. The one who took tough calls but didn’t mope around in self pity . The one who taught him to be strong and lead by example. But when she was doing all that she was trying to do , she didn’t term whatever she couldn’t manage as ‘Sacrifice’.

If you are a parent , esp a mother , what gets to you about the parenting stereotypes like this one?

Ain’t No Sacrifice
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4 thoughts on “Ain’t No Sacrifice

  • June 8, 2016 at 12:30 am

    Very nicely written and today all of us are prioritising. So its not sacrifice all but what do you want to do vis a vis what are the options available.

    • June 9, 2016 at 1:48 am

      Yes Anindya.. choices are tough for all of us .. esp parents. And life’s much easier when people don’t rub their choices in our face expecting the same ‘kind of sacrifice’ .
      thanks for dropping by ..

  • June 8, 2016 at 12:41 am

    What always makes me angry is tge expectation that others have. “She will sacrifice, she has too. There is so much geatness in that. Also when you achieve thing while you sacrifice isn’t it victory much sweeter” All genuine statements I have heard, and sadly most of them closer to home rather than from outsiders.

    Stereotyping is not something one can escape even today. I usually have a dont give a damn attitude about them. But the expectation does hurt, and the pain is unbearable sometimes beca use in the end we are all doing the best we know how.

    • June 9, 2016 at 1:53 am

      your impassioned tone makes me wonder if you’ve been at the receiving end of stereotyping as a parent.. I hear you Jaibala !!


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